


for kicks & for pleasure

by agreaterlove



Category: Never Have I Ever (TV)
Genre: College, Enemies to Lovers, F/M, Friends With Benefits, in which Ben and Devi aggressively hook up with each other in college to hide their feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-09
Updated: 2020-05-09
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:41:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,368
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24086803
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/agreaterlove/pseuds/agreaterlove
Summary: Devi rolls her eyes and gives up trying to explain it to him. “Look, I think to keep things light on the, you know, emotional front, but also allow us to have fun, I propose that we should enter a friends with benefits, or, um, enemies with benefits relationship? I mean, we should just, like, hook up with each other. Casually.”Ben can’t believe what he’s hearing. He can’t help but laugh. “You really haven’t changed, have you? You know, David, if two people want to casually sleep together they usually just do it without discussing it?”
Relationships: Ben Gross/Devi Vishwakumar
Comments: 13
Kudos: 333





	for kicks & for pleasure

**Author's Note:**

> hi, i literally haven't written a fic in 4 years (!!!!) but these two idiots have struck the hopeless romantic in me. i love them so much, they were made for me. i also watched this entire season in one night, so forgive me if there are any canonical errors <33

Due to semi-complicated circumstances, Devi had no idea where Ben decided to go to college. Until now. Until she sees him across the room, eyeing her over his beer bottle before turning back to his group of friends. 

Ben had decided to go to Princeton. The same school as Devi. Across the fucking country. So now Devi is pissed off beyond belief.

Devi is barely even tipsy, having only had a few sips of her vodka soda, yet she is already feeling the heat just by looking at Ben. She takes a tiny sip of her drink before slamming it on a nearby table, startling the group of girls she was talking to. Then, she marches over to Ben.

Ben doesn’t look up until she’s practically in his face. 

“ _Hey_ ,” she says. He still dressed like an amatuar rich kid. Black jeans, polka-dot top, and of course some weird designer Nikes, that probably cost upwards of a thousand dollars. Like he’s too rich to have real friends to tell him the truth.

Ben looks Devi up and down, laughing at her flared jeans that rise above her belly button. “Nice pants, David. But you do realize this isn’t some hippy-dippy party, right? Pretty sure that’s next door, you can practically smell it,” he says, to which his stupid friends laugh at.

Devi rolls her eyes. “What are you doing here?” she asks him.

Ben takes a sip of his beer, smirks, and says, “Same reason as you: to drink and have fun. Except, unlike you, I might get laid by the end of the night.” This earns him some even louder hollers from his buddies.

“You know what--” Devi starts, then realizes trying to talk to him here is pointless, so she grabs his arm and drags him outside. Surprisingly, it works, maybe because Ben isn’t even resisting. 

Outside, the cold air burns her arms and her slightly exposed stomach. She notices Ben glancing at her before looking up.

“Uh, why are we outside?” he asks her.

“I can’t talk to you seriously with you cracking jokes with your friends. I mean, you finally get friends and you’re _still_ an asshole.”

“No offense, but I didn’t even know we were on well-enough terms to talk seriously.”

She scoffs. “That makes sense, but, like, how am I supposed to react when I’m just now finding out you go to Princeton?”

Ben chugs his beer quickly, as though preparing himself for the ridiculousness of this conversation. He swallows and says, “That’s kinda your own fault, you know that, right? Also you don’t fucking own Princeton.”

Devi crosses her arms across her chest, now angry at herself for not bringing a jacket. “Did you know I was going to Princeton?”

“No,” he laughs. “You blocked me on everything and I guess no one thought to tell me. Still,” he pauses, looking her up and down, “it wouldn’t have affected my decision to go here. You know I always come out on top.”

Devi pretends to gag. “Ugh, _what?_ ”

Ben just smiles, then clears his throat. Suddenly, he’s looking at the sidewalk and not her, scratching the back of his neck. “You wanna come back to my place? I live in one of the apartments just a few blocks from here--my roommates should be out tonight.”

Devi can’t help but open her mouth in shock. Was he fucking serious? “Um, gross, Ben,” she says. She turns back to the house, deciding on if she should just abandon him, remembering how much she actually hated him.

“Just to like, talk. It’s been a while.”

“Okay, well we can talk at, like, IHop.”

“We could.”

Devi waits a few beats. Then, because she’s Devi, says, “Fuck it. It’s not far, right?”

Ben laughs. It’s a deep laugh, but almost comforting to Devi, oddly enough. “Nah, it’s not far. I can tell you’re cold.”

“Whatever, just lead the way.”

* * *

Technically, Devi and Ben had slept together once during senior year of high school. And they kissed once in sophomore year, but their more-than-platonic history didn’t extend further than that.

After they kissed in sophomore year, things got complicated. Ben had a girlfriend who he was terrified to break up with, and Devi was still conflicted about her feelings with Paxton. So they both just took the easy route: Ben stayed with Shira and Devi tried things out with Paxton.

Ben stayed with Shira surprisingly up until junior year--once she figured out she wasn’t interested in going to college, their lives just took separate paths. Paxton and Devi were on-and-off for years, both seemingly unable to compromise on their different worlds. 

Until, senior year, when Paxton dumped her. Like for good. Devi was sad for a while and then became angry. And since she couldn’t take out her anger on Paxton, she turned to her next best option: Ben Gross.

 _hey, this is weird but can we hang out soon?_ she texted him.

An hour later he responded.

_Yeah, is Saturday good for you?_

_yeah sure_

_I’ll pick you up at 6?_

_it’s a deal_

Devi didn’t know what they were gonna do, but she felt a weird feeling in her stomach. Excitement. For hanging out with Ben Gross. She knew he was just a distraction from her heartbreak, though. 

When Ben picked her up on Saturday, she was prepared.

“Drive to Malibu,” she told him, and that’s all she had to say.

They didn’t say anything for a while, not until the sun set. 

“We kissed here,” Ben said awkwardly, trying to make eye contact with her.

“We did,” Devi agreed.

“Then you dated Paxton.”

“Then you continued dating Shira.”

“That’s true.”

“Boys are so stupid.”

“Can’t argue with that.”

“Like, just be honest, you know?”

“Yeah. That was a good day.”

“What?”

“The day we kissed here. It was a good day.”

“Yeah, weird.”

“We should do it again.”

Devi looked at him, probably for the first time since they parked. Ben was looking at her and he was dead serious. Not smiling, just staring at her with his wide blue eyes. Almost terrified. 

“Okay,” is all she had to say before he grabbed her face and kissed her. 

Her chest burned with the heat of her heart beating fast. It felt weird, but also exciting. It had been so long since a kiss made her feel like that--since she’d been kissed like _that._

She fisted Ben’s shirt in her hands and pulled back a little bit to say briefly, “I’m gonna get on your lap now.”

Ben just nodded, pushing his seat back. Devi climbed onto his lap, careful not to press the horn on the steering wheel with her ass. Ben put his hands on her waist and Devi could practically feel the heat of them radiating through her shirt. 

It was in that moment, that Devi made a decision. Ben was kissing her neck, her ears, so she started unbuttoning his shirt. She caught his mouth with hers before saying, “I don’t usually do this. I don’t know why I am. We can pretend like it didn’t happen.”

Ben nodded dumbly again. His eyes were moving rapidly like a cat about to jump, like he couldn’t decide if he wanted to look at her eyes, her mouth, her shoulders, her legs. “It’s okay, you’re just blowing some steam off on me. It’s all good.”

Devi sighed with relief. “Okay, cool.”

“Glad we’re on the same page,” Ben said, resting one hand on the back of her neck before pulling her in again.

* * *

Ben’s room is small. Devi tells him as much.

“How chivalrous of you, to take the smallest room,” she notes.

“Well, the other guys’ egos wouldn’t fit in here, so,” he jokes.

Devi doesn’t laugh, but she smiles, which is enough for Ben.

It’s a weird site: Devi walking around his small room, occasionally picking things up and reading them. She finds a small flag with Phi Kappa Sigma’s symbols on it. She picks it up, shows it to him, and raises her eyebrows. 

“You’re in a fraternity?”

“I’m going to be, hopefully.”

“Oh my fucking _God_. Of course. You’re so predictable.” She puts it down and continues making her way around the room. 

“Really?” Ben says, starting to walk closer to her. “You really think I’m that predictable--”

“Holy _shit!”_ Devi exclaims. Ben looks and notices she’s opening the drawer of his nightstand. She pulls out a roll of Trojan condoms. “College Ben fucks, huh?”

Ben can feel the heat rising in his neck. He’s sure his face is red, and he’s thankful his room has dim lighting. “Does that surprise you?”

Devi puts the condoms back and shuts the drawer. “Honestly, I don’t know. I didn’t keep up with the details of your sex life in high school.” She spins around and sits on his bed, keeping her eyes on her feet. 

Was Devi jealous? Or did she just realize the irony of her statement? 

She leans back on her hands, and looks up at him, regaining her confidence. “So were they just hookups? Were they any good? Anything meaningful?” she inquires.

Ben laughs nervously. “Uh, I don’t know how to answer that. Yeah they were all fine.”

“I mean, you go to Princeton. I’m sure they were all smart girls, so what went wrong?” She leans her elbows on her knees. She’s genuinely curious and Ben can kind of sense why.

He sits beside her on the bed. “Yeah, well none of them were looking for that. Coursework is kinda too much to maintain an actual relationship.”

“That makes sense. It is a really good excuse.” Devi is leaning in slightly towards Ben. He wants to do something, and she knows he does too. 

“Excuse?” he clarifies. 

Devi nods. Her nose is practically touching his, so he just kisses her, and almost instantly Devi is kissing him back, probably with more force. He leans forward so she is lying on her back. She spreads her legs to cradle his body. Ben thinks she doesn’t realize how tight her grip is on his arms, but he doesn’t mind it. 

“Is this what you want to do?” he asks her, trailing kisses down her neck. 

“Yes,” she gasps, almost as if she’s desperate. Ben can’t help but wonder when the last time she’d done something like this. Was it with him, over a year ago?

“I knew you’d be back eventually,” he mumbles into her neck, pausing.

“Oh my God, just shut up, you’re so weird. Who says that?” she says, but Ben can feel that she’s anything but disgusted. 

He moves up, steadying one hand on his headboard to lean over her, looking her in the eyes. “Have you had any other experience, since, you know?”

She shifts her eyes. “Uh, yeah, obviously. I’m in _college_. You’re not special, trust me.”

Ben smiles and leans down to kiss her ear. “You’re cute when you lie. Especially when you think you can lie to me."

Devi kicks her leg over, pushing Ben onto his back, so now she’s on top of him. “Literally just shut up, we don’t need to talk.”

“Awesome. I’ve been waiting for you to shut up all night,” he says. Devi grumbles as he pulls her against him.

* * *

When Ben wakes up, Devi is gone. He assumes she has class and she wouldn’t be caught dead missing. But he doesn’t hear from her all day. Which he didn’t expect to. This happens all the time--he hooks up with people and then that’s it. He just figures Devi is different and a little inexperienced with the whole concept. Maybe he was wrong about her.

Ironically, he runs into Devi while walking to class. He wonders if they’d ever seen each other before last night and just not noticed. It would make sense, as Devi is clearly immersed in her phone in one hand, and holding a large iced coffee, which is more caramel syrup than coffee, in her other hand. It seems as if Devi, finally escaping her mom’s rules, has been taking college to its full advantage. 

“David!” he calls to her.

Devi stops in the middle of the sidewalk. “Oh, hey! I was _literally_ gonna text you!”

Of course she was. Ben can’t help but find it kind of endearing Devi’s lack of awareness of herself and how she fits into the world around her. It’s like she lived in a bubble, but it didn’t make her narcissistic, it just made her a little different. 

Ben pulls on his backpack straps. “Oh yeah? And why is that, huh?” He raises his eyebrows, trying to be suggestive.

Devi takes a sip of her sugary beverage and shakes her head. “I mean, shouldn’t we talk about it?”

Ben shrugs his shoulders. “I don’t know what you’re referring to, to be honest.”

Another sip of her caramel liquid concoction. “Yes, you do. Remember? We fucked after having literally not spoken for a year. I’m sure it’s very confusing for you.”

“I think it’s just confusing for you.”

Devi rolls her eyes and gives up trying to explain it to him. “Look, I think to keep things light on the, you know, emotional front, but also allow us to have fun, I propose that we should enter a friends with benefits, or, um, enemies with benefits relationship? I mean, we should just, like, hook up with each other. Casually.”

Ben can’t believe what he’s hearing. He can’t help but laugh. “You really haven’t changed, have you? You know, David, if two people want to casually sleep together they usually just do it without discussing it?”

“And you’re so typical. Communication is important, like setting boundaries. It’s healthy.”

Ben crosses his arms over his chest. “You could’ve just saved the energy and said you enjoyed the other night and wanted to do it again.”

“You flatter yourself,” Devi groans.

“I don’t really have to, you kind of just do it on your own.”

“Whatever, the point is, I think we should keep things, like, not serious. We can each see other people, but if feelings get involved we have to be honest with each other.”

Simple. “Sounds easy enough. So I guess I should expect to hear from you again soon?”

Devi pockets her phone and starts to walk away. “We’ll see.”

“Yes, we shall.”

* * *

Devi waits a week. And then she can’t stand it. She assumed Ben would’ve hit her up first at this point. Maybe he didn’t want to. Maybe she scared him away. Maybe he’s moved past the encounter.

Devi pushes these thoughts away. She’s a strong, confident woman and any man, even Ben Gross, is lucky to even touch her and experience her passion.

So that night Devi showers, shaves, moisturizes. She puts on the only pair of fancy lingerie she has: a matching red set she bought with the intention of wearing on Valentine’s Day for Paxton. But hopefully hooking up with Ben is good enough of a reason to wear it. Then, she throws on an oversized t-shirt and shorts. 

Hands slightly shaking, she quickly sends a text to Ben.

_u busy? can i come over?_

Her heart pounds for fifteen minutes until he responds.

_Just finishing up a paper, but come on over_

Holy shit. Even though she prepared herself, she didn’t expect that reponse. She quickly fills her purse with overnight essentials and makes her way over there. For a second she thinks maybe Ben will think it’s weird if she arrives there _too_ soon. But then she doesn’t care. He knows what she wants. There’s no use pretending.

Luckily, Devi had realized that Ben’s apartment wasn’t that far from the residence hall she lived in. It’s like it was fate, or something like that. But it only takes her ten minutes of walking (in the middle of the night, which probably wasn’t the best idea, but Devi was never known for her great ideas) before she arrives at Ben’s apartment. She’s surprised she even remembers which exact apartment is his, although she has her doubts for a few seconds.

She’s physically shaking when Ben opens the door. He’s dressed in a gray Princeton shirt and...Devi looks down to find him wearing a pair of red plaid boxers. Wow. Ben was kinda hot when he wasn’t trying.

“You gonna come in or just gawk at me?” he asks her. His voice is low and tired. Devi almost feels _bad_ for disturbing his work, but also she has to tell herself it’s just sex. She’s sure he needs a break.

“Of course I’m gonna come in. Unless you wanted to fuck me in the hallway,” she snaps back, walking past him. 

When she walks in, she’s greeted by two guys sitting on the couch staring at her. Shit, did they hear her? Devi decides not to care if they did. Besides, she was the one who was about to get laid, not them. 

Ben brushes past her, not even giving them an explanation, which is reasonable. Devi awkwardly follows him into his room. She turns around as he’s shutting the door behind them.

“Do you think they heard--”

She stops when Ben places his hands on her waist and kisses her. It’s a soft kiss, though and he pulls back easily.

“Damn, you really couldn’t wait to get your hands on me, huh?” she mumbles.

Ben draws his eyebrows together and smirks. “You’re the one that hit _me_ up, remember? You’ve probably been thinking about me every night, right?” He pulls her in for another kiss, which Devi accepts.

She tilts her head up to let him kiss her neck, so she can speak. “No, not every night. Just tonight. Which is why I hit you up. Obviously."

Ben steps forward, causing Devi to stumble into his desk behind her. He puts his hands on the back of her thighs, so Devi pushes herself to sit on the desk. “Is that so?” he mumbles into her shoulder. 

Devi nods. “I can feel your heart beating like really fast and hard, by the way, so don’t act like the feeling’s not mutual.”

Ben looks up at her and straightens himself out. “Well, obviously, otherwise I wouldn’t have let you come over.”

Devi finds her hands under his shirt, feeling the softness of his stomach. “Ugh, I’m not stupid.”

“Yeah, you’re a genius. And so am I.” He kisses underneath her jaw as one of his hands moves up her shirt and cups one of her breasts.

Devi’s body tightens and then relaxes. Her brain is starting to feel fuzzy and she can’t think straight, something she hates especially when she’s around Ben. “Wow, does asserting your, uh, intelligence make you hard or something?”

Ben moves to pull Devi’s shirt over her head. After tossing it on the floor, he just stares at her for a few seconds, almost in awe. “Maybe. I’m sure the same can be said for you,” he says. After he looks her up and down, he moves towards her again, his hands once again on her legs. “Your legs also help, too though,” he mumbles, trailing the tops of his fingers along her thighs. The movement causes goosebumps to appear on Devi’s legs. Ben looks up at her. “Like, damn, did not being able to walk for three months make your legs longer?”

Devi feels her ears grow warm. The compliment feels so odd, yet intimate. How did he remember it was three months specifically? Why is he bringing up a distant memory? Devi pushes her questions away and she can’t help but laugh at the comment.

Ben isn’t deterred and instead a smile spreads across his face, taking Devi’s laugh as a win. 

“You’re such a weirdo. I don’t think right now is an appropriate time to bring that up,” Devi tells him.

Ben leans forward. “Then give me something else to think about.”

Devi smiles and wraps her legs around him, crossing them behind his back. “Oh, I will.”

* * *

Devi can’t focus on her Macroeconomics homework. Half of her brain is thinking about how Ben’s body felt against hers, the things he whispered in her ear, and the other half is thinking about that fucking text message. 

Last night, Ben had gotten up to take a shower, and for some reason left his phone on his nightstand. Devi wasn’t that nosey, but still the invitation was there. She was scrolling through her phone, sitting cross-legged wearing Ben’s Princeton t-shirt, when his phone vibrated. Just out of simple curiosity, she leaned over to see the notification, expecting a lame news alert, maybe even a drunk text from one of his friends.

But no, it was a text from a girl named “Katie.”

_Hey, what are you up to?_

Devi had rolled her eyes. _He just finished boning me,_ she thought. Devi tried not to stress about it. It was inevitable, she literally told Ben they could see other people. The whole purpose of this so that it wasn’t complicated or stressful.

Then why is she thinking about it? Devi chugs her Starbucks Double Shot, slams it on the library table and chooses to ignore it. She decides to take a week detox from Ben. To keep their arrangement extra casual.

And she almost lasts a week, until Ben texts her four days later. Devi is studying for a German midterm in bed when her phone buzzes.

_Yo, you up?_

Devi shakes her head. She decides to leave him hanging. For five minutes.

_unfortunately i am_

A few minutes pass, then Ben responds.

_Sweet, what are you wearing?_

_are you serious?_

_Yes lol_

_super sexy sweatpants and a sweatshirt_

_Hot. You should come over_

_i’m on a hot date with german right now_

_I’ll walk over there and walk back here with you_

She thinks for a few seconds. It has to mean something that he wants to see her tonight, and not this Katie girl. Or is it just because Katie is different, more serious, and Devi is just a hookup? It doesn’t matter. If Devi wants to sleep with Ben tonight, she will. And she does.

_ok come rescue me from the torture of german_

* * *

“So, do you still think I’m unfuckable?” Devi asks Ben, as she’s lying down next to him, staring at his ceiling.

Ben has his laptop balanced on his lap, finishing up an assignment. It’s odd, but makes some sense: Ben still somehow bringing schoolwork into the bedroom. “Well, I have fucked you. Several times, in fact.”

Devi snorts. “You were really mean to me. You still are, but you _really_ hated me.”

Ben still doesn’t look up from his laptop, the blue light covering his entire face. “I don’t think much has changed, David. Plus we were, like, fifteen.”

She props herself on her elbow, turning to face him. “Oh so seeing each other completely naked and having had my literal tits in your mouth doesn’t make us friends?” she teases. 

“It’s happened before, and it didn’t change anything then,” he reminds her. 

Devi presses her lips together, trying to read him. He hasn’t smiled or anything once. An hour ago, he was all over her, and now he’s completely changed his mood, just by her bringing up the past. 

“Are you, like, for real mad about that?” She sits up slowly, hoping maybe he’ll at least look at her.

“I was never mad about it,” Ben says, letting out a forced laugh. He glances at her for a brief second, his eyes moving from her eyes, and then to her lips, probably out of habit.

“Did you like me?” she asks, mostly as a joke. The idea slightly thrills Devi: Ben pining after her, finally getting a chance, and then Devi shutting him out. In the fantasy, Devi was finally the cool girl. 

“I was interested in you. I mean, you know, in sophomore year. But, no, I didn’t think what we did was gonna lead anywhere. I just didn’t know why you blocked me, to be honest.”

Devi rolls her eyes and falls back down onto the bed. “Whatever. You were _totally_ in love with me.”

Ben shuts his laptop. “Why _did_ you block me?” he asks. He’s looking at her, like _actually_ looking at her, making sure she answers.

But Devi honestly doesn’t really know why she did. She was frustrated. That Monday, she expected Ben to act a little differently because she sure felt weird. When she saw him in class, her stomach hurt, a sensation she only ever associated with when she saw Paxton. Despite this, Ben had talked to her normally--the same snide remarks, but nothing personal. Like it meant nothing to him. Mostly Devi felt stupid for being confused when she so clearly didn’t like Ben and would never like Ben. 

Devi doesn’t tell Ben this, though. “I don't know. I was just, like, really mad. At Paxton and everyone and I guess I just took my anger out on you.”

Ben puts his laptop on his bedside table. “Okay, well, even though you didn’t apologize, I forgive you. Honestly, I thought maybe it was because you liked me or something.”

Devi turns away from him and pulls the blanket up close to her face, pretending she’s just tired. “That’s disgusting. You’re literally so conceited.”

“Whatever you say,” he says, and Devi can feel him literally right behind her, he’s practically breathing into her hair. “But for your information, there are plenty of girls that _do_ like me and don’t find it disgusting.” 

Devi scoffs, but she can’t help but feel hurt. _Girls like Katie?_ she thinks. “Yeah, I’m sure.”

* * *

Ben hears from Devi only once over the course of a week, when she sent him a video of two cats who start out fighting and then end up licking each other’s face. 

_is this us?_ she’d said along with it.

 _Very funny,_ Ben had sent back. 

He thinks she just must be busy with midterms, at least he’d barely thought about her because of his midterms at least. That’s what he tells himself.

Katie had texted him, inviting him out for a study date that night, but he hadn’t responded because he had a small, secret hope the night would be reserved for Devi. If she didn’t text him, fine, whatever. It’s worth a shot to see, though. 

As soon as Ben is finished with his final midterm, he texts her.

_Hey, what have you been up to?_

Surprisingly, but also not surprisingly, Devi responds very quickly.

_midterms obviously, dummy_

A few seconds go by.

_but like we can fuck tho_

_i need to relieve some stress_

Ben shakes his head, but he can’t help but laugh. 

_Right now?_

_yeah, sure_

_Alright, give me a few minutes to get back to my apartment_

_come to my dorm_

_my roommate went home for the weekend_

In the month that they’d been hooking up, they’d never actually done anything in Devi’s dorm. In fact, Ben had never really seen Devi’s room fully, just glimpses of it when he’d picked her up from her dorm. Ben wonders if this is a new level to their hooking up or something.

_I’ll be there in like 10_

* * *

Devi is nervous. More nervous than she usually is. She’s scanned her room to get rid of potential talking points, things Ben would surely make fun of. But she couldn’t hide her hot pink bed duvet that they would surely fuck on.

She hears a knock at her door and checks her phone. Of course Ben’s two minutes early. Devi tucks her hair behind her ears, checks herself briefly in the mirror above her desk, and goes to open the door. 

“Hey,” Ben breathes out as soon as she opens the door, as though he ran a mile to get there.

“Yeah, hi,” Devi mutters before pulling him inside quickly.

Ben’s gaze immediately goes to the practically illuminating pink bedspread. “I like the pink--”

Devi pushes him towards the bed. “I don’t wanna talk,” she says as he sits on the edge of the bed. She’s already pulling her shirt over her head, and starts to take off her pants.

“It’s kinda cute, though,” he says.

“Hey, what did I say?”

“No talking.”

“Good.” Devi nods. She finishes tugging off her jeans. When she’s finished, she climbs onto Ben’s lap. She leans forward to begin aggressively making out with him when he grabs her arms and pushes her away slightly. 

“Are you okay, Devi?” Ben asks. He never calls her by her actual name. He’s looking at her, his eyes are wide and Devi hates them--hates his ocean blue eyes, hates that they make her stomach drop. 

“Yeah, we’re just enemies that are fucking, like, we don’t really need to talk. I’m relieving stress, like I said.” She tries to lean in again, but Ben’s arms are too strong for her, his hands can literally wrap around her biceps.

“You don’t have to pretend. Just tell me what’s going on.” He says it so softly, Devi feels a need to trust him. 

She relaxes her shoulders and slides off of him. Suddenly extremely cold due to the lack of clothes she has on, she pulls her legs up and wraps her arms around them. “Okay, but please don’t make fun of me. It’s literally _so_ stupid. But, like, the other night I saw some girl texted you. You were in the shower and it was just _there_. It’s stupid to get jealous over I know. I’m just a loser...an unfuckable one,” she says, adding the last part as mostly a joke.

Ben chuckles quietly. “Ok, well first of all, you’re not a loser. And you’re certainly not an unfuckable one, considering I’ve fucked you and have _continued_ to fuck you--”

“Please stop saying fuck.”

“--my point is, it’s normal for you to get upset over that. If you want to know the truth, she was some girl I met at a party about two months ago. She doesn’t even go to Princeton and I honestly don’t really like her that much. I haven’t even slept with her, if you’re curious.”

“I actually was curious, so thank you,” Devi mumbles into her knees.

“But, I kind of do need to know if you have feelings for me,” he says. “You know, you said that yourself.”

“I don’t know if I do,” Devi admits.

“I mean, you obviously feel _something_ towards me to get angry over a text from a girl.”

“Yeah, hatred. It’s always been that way.”

“David--”

Devi unwraps her arms from around her legs and spreads them out. “This is so embarrassing. I hate this.”

Ben looks down and then he places a hand on her thigh. Devi stares at it, confused. “I just don’t know why you enjoy pretending you don’t like me. It’s like you use hating me and bickering with me as a way to cover it up.”

Devi shakes her head. “You do the same thing.”

“That’s true.”

They stare at each other for a few seconds. Devi doesn’t know why she’s never acknowledged it but Ben Gross isn’t bad looking. To be fair, she wouldn’t have continuously seen a guy naked that she didn’t find nice to look at. She looks down at his hand that’s still on her thigh. “Do you like me?” she asks him.

The edge of Ben’s mouth quirks up into a half-smile. “I’ve always liked you on some level. You’re pretty, smart, and a badass, why wouldn’t I? You’ve just pushed me away.”

Devi smiles back. “Well, it has always been mutual.” She leans forward and fists her hands into his shirt. “How about I make it up to you by _pulling_ you... _closer_?”

He follows her lead and leans forward, until his arms are resting on either side of her head. “Yeah, I’d like that. I think that would make it all worth it.”

Devi places her hands behind his neck, ready to pull him in. They smile wide at each other. “That’s good. I’m glad we’re on the same page.”


End file.
